But after the peer review session and a chat with Ben, I feel a bit better about my practice.
One of the main things I struggle with in my work is that I'm a very text-based illustrator. Not just in my final images (I love making comics/narratives), but also in my sketchbook. When we have crits and I see other people's sketchbooks and work, I'm always intimidated by how much drawing and other visual work they've produced.
The way I work is by making lists, mind-maps, and other text-based ways of showing ideas, so when I see other people's sketchbooks and they have far more, or a higher quality of visual work, I always feel a bit overwhelmed and I think that makes me shut down more?
I'm very ideas based and sometimes I forget that that's okay! Although I definitely do need to crack on with some visual work too.
After I post this, I'm going to get down in the print room and make something!
One of the things I spoke about with my counsellor is my motivation/stress. We identified that I have a lot of motivation (procrastination?) for other creative projects (for example: selling things on Etsy, personal work, and a birthday present for my mum), but none for my uni work. The main difference obviously being that my personal projects are for me and university work is marked. Obviously, still being on this course, I do love drawing, but I think being a bit of a perfectionist, the stress of producing work that is eventually going to be seen and judged by others is a lot of pressure for me to deal with. The way I deal with stress is to shut down and not deal with it until I absolutely have to. This is an ongoing problem and I need to identify ways to cope with stress and find the fun. I'm still learning.
SO
Suggestions (from peers and Ben):
- GET IN THE PRINT ROOM!
- Take one idea (my favourite) and produce it in different ways - lino, mono, screen print etc.
- Loosen up - have FUN drawing
- Make storyboards
- Take ideas into digital - combine textures
- Work bigger, looser?
- Introduce colour? - I draw in black line/pencil a LOT
Ben gave me one artist to look at: Yann Kebbi
Ben pointed out that the characters in this image are all drawn in different ways and styles, and maybe that's what I need to do in order to have fun and maybe find my style?
That's one other thing I'm struggling with - what is my style?! How do I draw?
I think that's been holding me back too - as I said before, I'm a perfectionist, so I'm very aware of the fact that I don't really have a style I'm comfortable with yet. I don't know how I draw people.
Over summer and a bit of last year, I was very influenced by a couple of illustrators I admire - Kate Beaton and Bryan Lee O'Malley - but almost too influenced. When I was drawing I would ask myself how they drew things instead of figuring out how I drew things. I need to find the balance between being influenced by artists and outright copying them.
So I think keeping in mind Yann Kebbi's work may help me.
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